Random Bedtime Ramblings, by Colin

Colin makes some of the most interesting, and often hilarious, observations at bedtime. The other night Russ commented that I should be writing these down. Yes, I should.

(door opens)

C: Mom, do mice kill people?

J: No honey.

C: Tunnel web spiders do. They live in Australia. I hate Australia because tunnel web spiders scare me.

J: Well, you can just stay here then. How about going back to bed?

C: Okay. Goodnight.

(door closes)

(door opens)

C: Mom, what kind of sport did we play at the Rec Department in the winter of 2009?

J: You didn't play a sport then. In the spring you played Tball and tennis.

C: Can I play tennis in the spring of 2011?

J: Sure. Go back to bed. I love you.

C: I love you too.

(door closes)

(door opens)

C: Mom, I don't like smiley faces that are cut in half.

J: Me neither. (?)

(door closes)

(door opens)

C: Mom, how did God make your boobies?

J: Umm.. (thoughts of a conversation about mother's milk goes through my mind)... I don't know.

(door closes)

(door opens)

C: Mom, how did they make my eyeballs?

R: (Russ interjects) In a special eyeball factory.

C: Dad!

R: God made them.

C: But how did God make my eyeballs?

J: I don't know honey.

(door closes)

(door opens)

C: When I am a grown up and after I am married and when she has a baby in her tummy, how does it get there?

J: It's kind of hard to explain.

C: Did God put the baby in her tummy?

J: Yes.

C: How does it come out?

J: You have lots of time to figure this one out. You will not need to worry about it for many years.

C: What doctor will I go see?

J: An obstetrician.

C: An obstetrician? Okay.

(door closes)