Full Meltdown Mode - Now What?

It is inevitable - meltdowns will occur. We have learned several little tricks to help smooth the waters a little and make the meltdowns less frequent and more manageable.

Time out... for you!
You will only be helpful to your family if your mental wellbeing is well intact. So, if you feel yourself becoming frustrated take a time out from the situation. Remove yourself, take a small break, and then return when you have collected your wits.

Safe Zones
Your child needs a safe zone where he can pitch his fit and not hurt himself. My twins' bedroom was their place. For years it only had a bed (mattress on the floor) and a few other minor pieces of furniture. It was a very sparce place, and looking at it you would almost think that we couldn't afford furniture for them. (Not that this wasn't necessarily true. I was a stay-at-home mom for six years, afterall).

Tag Team
Work together with your partner and not against. I have found that often when my children are not responding to me, my husband can step in and they will start to calm themselves, and the opposite is also true. I believe that sometimes they are upset but honestly have no idea why (or at least have forgotten why after a few minutes of the meltdown), and changing things up will give them just enough of a break to allow them to start to relax.

Rewards (or the Lack of Rewards)
As a general rule I don't like the idea of rewarding a child for something that he should be doing anyway. However, special circumstances require special techniques. We have used rewards, or the lack of rewards to help our children calm themselves. For example, the threat of no ice cream money can sometimes help when all else has failed. This usually is only helpful when the child still has a rational thought.

Trust Yourself
The most important thing I can tell you is to trust your instincts. No one can give you an instruction manual on how to deal with a child in full meltdown mode, but you will know what to do if you believe in yourself and your child. Often I find what works completely by accident. I will start talking and by the grace of God the right words will flow out. Believe in yourself, trust your instincts, listen to your child, and remember, this too shall pass.